Last week’s assignment from the Creative Writing class. We had to choose one of the following and write 200 words:
Two strangers in a supermarket stare at the shelves of cat food.
“On my morning perambulations of the emporium I notice many things. For instance, many more yards of shelving are devoted to pet foods than to the pabulums and powders these people feed their babies. Can it be that they hold their pets in higher esteem than their offspring? In my country, it is not unknown for children to die in the street from hunger. Cats fend for themselves and dogs are fed table-scraps. However, I quibble; I am most grateful for the shelter I have been accorded and fortunate to be employed.”
“I can’t believe he has gone and left me his bloody cat. I hate it. I wish I could strangle it. It pads around the flat, yowling. When it does sit still it glares at me through half-closed eyes. Once, I woke up with it sitting on my chest — like an incubus — my screams sent it hurtling under the bed where, thankfully, it remained. It won’t eat just anything; only the most expensive cat food and not any old flavour either. And don’t get me started on the tons of cat litter I drag up- and downstairs. Revolting.”
It was windy yesterday but bright. In the night the wind got up again and a gale started to blow and today the weather is very dreary. I have to keep fighting the urge check on my new trees. I find the best policy with the newly-planted is to ignore, except of course if they need watering, which, looking at the desolate scene out of the window today won’t be for a while. I suppose we should be grateful the wind is from the South and not the North like last year — the Northern wind did so much damage in the garden, quite a few of my trees suffered badly burnt leaves. It’s surprising how destructive a freezing wind is.
The great excitement of the day was that one of the cows got out of the field next door. I saw it from my bathroom window looking over my garden wall, speculatively. Luckily, my plumber was here so he ran out to shoo the cow up the lane towards A’s, away from the main road until F arrived. The thrill! I would have been most pissed off if it had decided to come in and trample my plants though and it was the one time my gate was open too.
I am becoming fanatical about keeping the gate closed — one cow is all it would take for complete disaster. Luckily F has re-jigged the electric fence at the back wall which means I will be able to use my hedge-trimmer without zapping myself in the process.
I am quite tempted just to watch Netflix — which I am sorry to say I did all afternoon yesterday — but enough off this, I’m off to the Shed.
This evening is the second workshop for creative writing with Denyse Woods. We are given assignments every week and I think I will post them up here, it’s good practice if nothing else.
Poet and Saint! to thee alone are given The two most sacred names of Earth and Heaven, The hard and rarest Union which can be Next that of Godhead with Humanitie. Long did the Muses banisht Slaves abide, And built vain Pyramids to mortal pride; Like Moses Thou (though Spells and Charms withstand) Hast brought them nobly home back to their Holy Land. Ah wretched We, Poets of Earth! but Thou Wert Living the same Poet which thou’rt Now. Whilst Angels sing to thee their ayres divine, And joy in an applause so great as thine. Equal society with them to hold, Thou need’st not make new Songs, but say the Old. And they (kind Spirits!) shall all rejoice to see How little less than They, Exalted Man may be. Still the old Heathen Gods in Numbers dwell, The Heav’nliest thing on earth still keeps up Hell. Nor have we yet quite purg’d the Christian Land; Still Idols here like Calves at Bethel stand. And though Pans Death long since all Oracles breaks, Yet still in Rhyme the Fiend Apollo speaks; Nay with the worst of Heathen dotage we (Vain men!) the Monster Woman Deifie; Find Stars, and tie our Fates there in a Face, And Paradise in them by whom we lost it, place. What different faults corrupt our Muses thus Wanton as Girles, as old Wives, Fabulous! Thy spotless Muse, like Mary, did contain The boundless Godhead; she did well disdain That her eternal Verse employ’d should be On a less subject than Eternitie; And for a sacred Mistress scorn’d to take, But her whom God himself scorn’d not his Spouse to make. It (in a kind) her Miracle did do; A fruitful Mother was, and Virgin too. How well (blest Swan) did Fate contrive thy death; And make thee render up thy tuneful breath In thy great Mistress arms? thou most divine And richest Off’ering of Loretto’s shrine! Where like some holy Sacrifice t’ expire A Fever burns thee, and Love lights the Fire. Angels (they say) brought the fam’d Chappel there, And bore the sacred Load in Triumph through the air. ‘Tis surer much they brought thee there, and They, And Thou, their charge, went singing all the way. Pardon, my Mother Church, if I consent That Angels led him when from thee he went, For even in Error sure no Danger is When joyn’d with so much Piety as His. Ah, mighty God, with shame I speak’t, and grief, Ah that our greatest Faults were in Belief! And our weak Reason were ev’en weaker yet, Rather than thus our Wills too strong for it. His Faith perhaps in some nice Tenents might Be wrong; his Life, I’m sure, was in the right. And I myself a Catholick will be, So far at least, great Saint, to Pray to thee. Hail, Bard Triumphant! and some care bestow On us, the Poets Militant Below! Oppos’ed by our old En’emy, adverse Chance, Attack’ed by Envy, and by Ignorance, Enchain’d by Beauty, tortur’d by Desires, Expos’d by Tyrant-Love to savage Beasts and Fires. Thou from low earth in nobler Flames didst rise, And like Elijah, mount Alive the skies. Elisha-like (but with a wish much less, More fit thy Greatness, and my Littleness) Lo here I beg (I whom thou once didst prove So humble to Esteem, so Good to Love) Not that thy Spirit might on me Doubled be, I ask but Half thy mighty Spirit for Me; And when my Muse soars with so strong a Wing, ‘Twill learn of things Divine, and first of Thee to sing.